Sorrow

Kimball Ryan Fuhriman passed away today in the arms of his mother. With peacefulness the veil between this world and the next opened up and welcomed our son around four o'closk in the afternoon at our home. Kimball, we love you and miss you dearly and cant wait to see you again. It is with much pain that I write the remaining of this post and the moments leading up to his passing.

Wednesday July 30th,
We had family visit today to see Kimball for possibaly the last time. We have talked to the doctors to find out if there is a chance the we can have Kimball transported to our house to have his last moments or days with us in a more comfortable setting. Once the medicine used to keep his artery between the Aorta and the Pulmonary open is shut off, the doctors told us that they are not sure how long Kimball would have. It could be hours it could be weeks.
So we spent as much time with him today as we could and so did family. They have all come from great distances and by different means but we appreciate these visits all the same. The Nurses have been so kind to us, especially under these circumstances. Sarah, who is one of Kimball's nurses took it upon herself and made a little scrapbook for us with pictures and cutouts. It turned out really wonderful and appreciate it. They also created a memory box for us filled with items that we could use to remember Kimball by.
It was also a hard day because we were not sure how Alissa would handle the news and how we were going to tell her. We had contemplated this for days and felt that the right things would be said to her. Tracy and I tried to explain, but we think that she is too young to fully understand. We will continue to remind her of her little brother so one day she can finally understand and know about him.
Later in the day we were blessed to find out that we would be able to transfer Kimball to our house where we would then take him off of the oxygen and his medicine to be with us until the end. This was pleasant news to hear. We found out that we were handling things fairly well considering and know that it is from the numerous prayers and blessings that we have received. Thank you everyone for these prayers, we appreciate it so much that we truly feel loved and thought of.
The transfer would be early the next morning, so many things had to take place. I had to learn how to replace a feeding tube (which is inserted through the nose down into the stomach) just in case it happened to be removed. I learned how to feed him with the syring and how to administer his "comfort" medicine, which consisted of Adivan (a light seditive) and Morphine for discomfort. We were also informed of the signs that would be present when time was winding down for him. All of this seemed a little too much but had to be done. Because of legal issues Kimball's care would be transfered to a Hospise facility who would come to our house and help give additional medication if needed. It was very hard to sleep that night. Tracy woke up at 1 in the morning and began to pack up (since there was nothing better to do).

Thursday, July 31st

Today is Kimball's 2 week birthday. We are glad that he has made it this far. We got ready and headed to Kimball's room bright and early. We did not want to be late, and wanted some time with Kimball before the nurses and crew would be there to transfer him into the ambulance. Again, we all felt calm and peaceful about things and were excited to go home. Tracy was going to be riding with Kimball in the ambulance and I would drive with Alissa back home.
Since being in front of the Ambulance, I ariived in town around 12:45 and the ambulance was about an hour behind me. I got settled in and got everything ready for Kimball.
Around 1:30 the Kimball finally arrived home. (One of two homes that he would be visiting that day). We brought him in and held him for about an hour and a half all while on his medicine and oxygen. My mom and a few of Tracy's family were present and were able to hold Kimball during this time. But we knew this could not last, so aroun 3:00 we let the nurse know that we were ready to take the oxygen off and remove the medicine. We had felt that once this happened, even though the doctors said it could be weeks before he passed, that Kimball would go quickly. Tracy sat down and took him in her arms and over the next 45 minutes we watched Kimball pass away. This has been the hardest thing that we have ever done and hope that we do not have to experience letting one of our children go again.
We wanted have some more time with Kimball, so we held him and hugged him. I couldnt help but take him up to his room and show him his place that he would have slept and played. Where he would be when he would awake at all hours of the night to be fed. Where he would be rocked to sleep during the day for his naps. Where he would learn to love the Seahawks to eventually watch them play with his dad. All these memories, even though they did not really happen, played in my head as we stood in his room. All of these memories even though they do not exist play in my head now as I cry, typing this memorial to him.
We then called the corroner who came to take Kimball away from us....to take him away for the last time. It was very hard to hand him over.....to release him from our arms.
Kimball we love you!!! Even though the doctors could not fix your broken heart.....we pray that you can fix our broken hearts!!